Sunday, December 18, 2011

Is my relationship dysfunctional?

Recently I have been noticing some stuff about my boyfriend's character that really bug me. I find myself annoyed with him a lot of the time, for stuff that he cannot help. We have been together for about a year and four months, I still love him to death but I just feel so guilty for being so annoyed by him a lot of the time. He has really low self esteem so to compensate he has a pretty big ego around people besides me. He is a bit of a perfectionist subconsciously, and he has OCD. We are very opposite in the sense that I really don't mind chaos. Its so hard because last night we got in a fight about something stupid but I ended up telling him about how he is condescending sometimes and some other stuff. Then he got really upset and stared bawling because he felt like he was such a terrible person an he started talking about how he hardly has anything to complain about concerning me but I have so many things to get mad about and how I am such a better person than him. And it made me feel terrible. I just feel like such a shitty person for being annoyed with my boyfriend so much and uming so much bad stuff about us. I love him so so much but this cant be good for our relationship. It worries me, am I in the wrong relationship? Am I just the perfectionist? What can I do? I don't want to break up with him. I love him and I don't want to lose him. I praise him so much but when I finally talk about something that bothers me it knocks him down so hard and I feel like such a horrible girlfriend.

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